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Alfie (Law) is a handsome Englishman in Manhattan, where he drives a limo and enjoys the commitment-free life. But his "quasi-girlfriend" Julie (Tomei) wants more out of him, and his coworker Marlon (Epps) is settling down with his girlfriend (Long). So Alfie starts thinking. Sort of. He starts a relationship with a party girl (Miller) and then begins to fall in love with a sexy businesswoman (Sarandon). He's on a journey into Important Life Lessons here, but will he finally be able to answer that question: What's it all about?

Duh! It's an American remake! In other words, it's moralising and preachy that poor Alfie couldn't miss the message if he tried. Where the character badly needs a streak of ironic nastiness, the filmmakers insert a soft, mushy centre instead. We never believe he's a misogynist womaniser--all four women he beds in the film carry strong emotional baggage for him. For a film about sexual irresponsibility, this is far too puritanical and sanitised. The script is just not clever enough for the subject matter, taking a simplistic, watered-down route through what should be thought-provoking subject matter.

And there's another problem: The role needs someone who gets by on charisma more than looks. Law is a Greek god who comes across as oily and smug when he lays on the charm. And it doesn't help that he's directed to deliver the straight-to-camera narration in such a swaggering way, making him even smarmier. In the dramatic scenes, Law is excellent and likeable; but in his chatty commentary he's borderline despicable. The surrounding cast is good--Epps and Long get the emotional scenes, Sarandon is in sexy Bull Durham mode, Tomei adds substance in surprising ways. But the film is far too excited about itself, and Shyer's attempts to generate sympathy for this supposedly broken man are completely wasted.